So we’ve all heard of ‘the one that got away’, you know? The childhood sweetheart who may have been your perfect match- but you were too busy being young and having fun!
Now, how about ‘the one that shouldn’t have ever been with you in the first place, but instead should have fallen straight into the inevitable flames of hell and perished?’ – okay so the hell bit is a little bit excessive, but we all know what I’m talking about right?
I guarantee you if you haven’t met him yet- you will. If you’ve been there-you can totally relate. So here is a list of warning signs, that maybe he is just not the one for you. It is all to common for us ladies to try salvage things, you may want to repair the rip on last years winter coat or you know…simply give your boyfriend a complete personality transplant? Well, hey- sometimes, it’s best to just ditch the jacket and get a new one.
- He is never there.
No girls, this doesn’t mean he has incredible magical talents and can disappear at will. It means he does not want to spend time with you. It is that simple. He is not investing into more ‘me’ time but less ‘you’ time. If he is constantly making excuses not to be around you, or going out without you every single time, wake up and realise he is not in this for the two of you. You should never use your precious time to convince someone to spend it with you. Make your time valuable- share it with those that respect it. You shouldn’t be with somebody and feel alone.
- You struggle to find common ground
When you first met, this was one of the reasons you liked him! Wow, he’s really into winter sports, and has a body to match. Err.. you hate the cold and skiing is your idea of a nightmare, funny that- didn’t you just mention you spend your annual leave in a skiing resort? That’s right. I’m not saying it’s bad to have different interests- it’s healthy in fact, but not to a point where you have nothing you like to do or talk about together.
- He is not supportive
One of the worst things anybody can do is belittle your achievements- and this is exactly what this man does. He challenges your ambitions and makes them feel un-achievable. He never fails to tell you why you can’t do something, and he’s quick to point out your mistakes. There are only one of two things that can happen in this situation- 1. You will begin to believe this man and become a shell of your former self, or 2. You disagree and stand up for yourself. Don’t let this man fool you into believing he is right.
- He is not affectionate
If a man does not show you some form of affection or appreciation he is not right for you. You wouldn’t be friends with someone who was at best apathetic towards you, so why be in a relationship with someone like this? Your relationship has become less then platonic. He always gives you the cold shoulder and is a man of few words. When you’re out with friends he seems perfectly agreeable, but behind closed doors he has lost all interest in you both intimately and intelligently.
- He controls everything you do.
I call this man ‘The Other Mother’. It’s like your 14, your favourite band has come to town and all your friends are going- but Mum said no! He wants to know where you are, who your with and what your doing all the time- what you didn’t realise, is it doesn’t matter what your reply is, he will never agree with what your doing. This man will stifle your individuality. You should be dating a man, not your mother.
- You don’t see a future there
Maybe he’s not Mr. Right, just Mister. Right Now- and that’s okay, nobody is telling you otherwise. But if you admit that you don’t see yourself growing old with him- then it probably means that you shouldn’t. Trust your intuition.
These are just to name a few, there are many different variations of the guy you shouldn’t be with. The interesting thing is if your with him and you have doubts- you probably already know he’s not right for you. All I can say is, your world will not stop by leaving this guy. There are masses of fantastic guys out there who will treat you the right way, don’t waste your time on a loser.
Love B.W.C xoxo